Awesome Everywhere!

United Arab Emirates


United States


Ann Arbor, MI

Asheville, NC

Atlanta, GA

Austin, TX

Baltimore, MD

Birmingham, AL

Boston, MA

Buffalo, NY

Cass Clay

Chicago, IL

Cleveland, OH

Columbus, OH

Denver, CO

Erie, PA

Gainesville, FL

Gloucester, MA

Key West, FL

Los Angeles, CA

Louisville, KY

Miami, FL

Montclair, NJ

New York City, NY

Newburgh, NY

North Minneapolis, MN

Northern Virginia (NOVA)

Oahu, HI

Oakland, CA

Oklahoma City, OK

Orlando, FL

Philadelphia, PA

Phoenix, AZ

Piqua, OH

Pittsburgh, PA

Plano, TX

Port Washington, NY

Portland, OR

Poughkeepsie, NY

Pueblo, CO

Raleigh-Durham, NC

Rochester, NY

Rockport, MA

San Antonio, TX

San Francisco, CA

San Jose, CA

Santa Fe, NM

Seattle, WA

South Bend, IN

State College, PA

Tallahassee, FL

Washington, DC

Youngstown, OH


I am creating a satirical corporate phone tree. When it’s complete, people will be able to call a toll-free number and attempt to reach a real person, navigating a maze of menu options. During the call they will face many obstacles, including terrible smooth jazz, the dread of infinitely being stuck on hold, and accidentally launching a nuclear war. In other words, it’s just like an average call to the cable company.

A grant from the Awesome Foundation will help me hire voice actors and will also help me keep the line active and free to the public. I think maintaining a mysterious corporate customer service number, confusing and disturbing anyone foolish enough to call it, would be a great public service.

Funded by San Francisco, CA (February 2016)